All Saints’ Day and the Sacred Act of Remembering: Finding Faith and Hope in the Face of Grief
Grief changes how we see everything—our days, our relationships, even our faith. It slows us down and asks questions we don’t always know how to answer. For many people, faith offers comfort; for others, it feels fragile or far away.
Every year on November 1, many Catholic and Protestant Christians around the world observe All Saints’ Day, a day to remember those who have gone before us in faith. It’s a tender invitation to pause, to light candles, and to speak names aloud. In a world that often rushes past loss, this day reminds us that remembering is sacred work.
As someone who offers grief counseling in San Diego, I’ve walked alongside many people who long to reconnect faith and healing. All Saints’ Day offers us a rhythm for that—an ancient ritual that still whispers peace into modern hearts.
What All Saints’ Day Teaches Us About Grief
The tradition of All Saints’ Day dates back more than a thousand years. Early Christians set aside a day to honor not only the well-known saints but all believers—ordinary people whose lives reflected faith, hope, and love.
In many churches, the names of those who have died in the past year are read aloud while candles are lit. Bells may toll. Some congregations invite members to place photos or flowers near the altar. When I was in graduate school, I worked part-time for a small Presbyterian church as the Administrative Assistant in the front office. I can still remember the special Sunday service where we observed this special holiday each year, in the beginning of November, by listing the names of all those who had departed in the past year.
It began small, with a simple printed list, included with the bulletin. However, over the years, I collaborated with the pastor, worship director and church elders to put together a special presentation such as a short slide show with not just the names of those who we lost, but also their pictures, against the backdrop of some beautiful and contemplative music being played by our gifted pianist, Lynnette. These acts may seem simple, yet they hold deep meaning: You are remembered. You are loved. Your life mattered.
I find that deeply moving because it mirrors what grief counseling often provides—a sacred pause, a moment to name the loss and acknowledge its weight before continuing on.
The Sacred Act of Remembering
Throughout Scripture, the word remember appears again and again. “I will remember the deeds of the Lord,” writes the psalmist (Psalm 77:11). Remembering is an act of faith. It keeps love alive, helps us find gratitude amid pain, and invites us to trust that God has not forgotten us either.
When we remember someone we’ve lost, we’re participating in that same spiritual rhythm. We thank God for the gift of their life. We honor the lessons they left behind. And we allow our hearts to stay tender instead of closing off in self-protection.
Henri Nouwen once wrote, “When we lose a beloved friend, we are called to remember that our love is not taken away but transformed.” That transformation is what faith helps us see—the movement from despair toward hope, from absence toward presence in a new way.
When Faith Feels Fragile
Still, faith and grief are not always easy companions. Loss can shake everything we once believed. People tell me, “I can’t pray,” or “I don’t feel God near anymore.” If you’ve felt that too, you are not alone. Even Jesus wept at the tomb of his friend Lazarus.
Faith doesn’t erase grief; it gives us somewhere to bring it. All Saints’ Day is not about pretending everything is fine. It’s about bringing our tears, doubts, and questions before God and trusting that He can hold them all.
In grief therapy in San Diego, I often encourage clients to be honest about where they are spiritually. Healing begins when we stop judging our grief or our faith journey and simply tell the truth. Sometimes belief looks like a whisper: “Lord, help me.” Sometimes it’s silent waiting. Both are holy.
Faith Practices That Bring Comfort
If you’re looking for ways to observe All Saints’ Day or to create your own spiritual remembrance, here are gentle ideas that can help you honor both your loss and your faith:
Light a candle and speak your loved one’s name aloud. Let the flame remind you of the light they brought to your life.
Pray or write a letter to God about your grief. Tell Him everything—your gratitude, your anger, your ache. He can handle it all.
Attend a church service or set aside quiet time to read Scripture and reflect.
Meditate on verses like Psalm 34:18 (“The Lord is close to the brokenhearted”) or Revelation 21:4 (“He will wipe every tear from their eyes”).
Listen to worship music or hymns that comfort you. Music often speaks the prayers our hearts can’t form.
If you come from a different faith background—or none at all—you can adapt these rituals in ways that fit your beliefs. What matters most is making space for remembrance and peace.When Grief and Therapy Work Together
Some people worry that therapy and faith don’t belong in the same conversation. I believe they can beautifully complement each other. Therapy helps you understand and process the emotional reality of loss, while faith provides context, hope, and meaning.
In my practice, I integrate faith-based principles when clients request it, while always respecting individual beliefs. Some sessions include prayer or spiritual reflection; others simply hold quiet compassion. Whether your faith feels strong, distant, or uncertain, therapy offers a space where your whole self—mind, body, and spirit—can heal.
If your grief is connected to trauma, therapy can also help you process memories safely and restore trust in both God and yourself. You can learn more about my approach on my specialty pages:
Trauma Therapy and EMDR in Chula Vista
The Communion of Saints: We Are Never Alone
One of my favorite images in Christian theology is the “communion of saints.” It’s the belief that those who have gone before us in faith are still connected to us—a great “cloud of witnesses” surrounding us with unseen love (Hebrews 12:1).
That image has comforted countless grieving hearts. It means that love is not limited by time or space. Our loved ones are part of God’s eternal story, and so are we.
When I think of my own grandmother, gone now but still deeply present in my heart, I imagine her among that cloud of witnesses—smiling, praying, cheering on each new generation. Remembering her faith reminds me to keep my own alive.
Learning to Grieve with Hope
To remember is to love again. All Saints’ Day reminds us that our grief is not evidence of weak faith; it’s evidence of deep love. The very heart that hurts is the heart that has loved well.
If you are walking through loss, may you know this: God meets you exactly where you are. He isn’t asking you to rush or to pretend. He simply invites you to rest, to remember, and to trust that healing will come, one breath at a time.
Closing Reflection
Grief is sacred because it reveals how much we’ve loved. Faith is sacred because it reminds us that love never ends.
As we light our candles this All Saints’ Day, may we remember those who came before us—their kindness, their courage, their faith—and may we feel their light continuing to guide us forward.
If you’re longing for peace or struggling to find hope after loss, I invite you to reach out for grief counseling in San Diego. Together, we can create a space where your faith and your healing can grow side by side.
“The Lord will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore.”
(Psalm 121:8)FAQ: Grief Counseling in San Diego
1. What is All Saints’ Day?
All Saints’ Day is a Christian tradition celebrated on November 1st to honor those who have gone before us in faith—both the well-known saints and ordinary people who lived lives of love, service, and belief. It’s a day to remember loved ones and give thanks for their presence in our lives.
2. How can All Saints’ Day help me process grief?
It gives us a sacred opportunity to pause, remember, and honor those we’ve lost. Lighting candles, reading Scripture, or saying prayers for loved ones helps transform sorrow into gratitude and connection. Faith-based rituals like these can provide comfort and peace.
3. What if my faith feels distant or uncertain since my loss?
That’s very normal. Grief often brings questions and doubt. In grief therapy in San Diego, I offer a safe, nonjudgmental space for you to explore those feelings. Healing and faith are both journeys—they don’t require perfection, just honesty.
4. Can I bring faith into my counseling sessions?
Yes, absolutely. Many of my clients appreciate faith-based therapy that integrates prayer, Scripture, or spiritual reflection as part of their healing. I also welcome clients from all backgrounds and beliefs, ensuring your counseling experience feels safe, non-judgemental, and authentic to you.
5. What are some ways to observe All Saints’ Day at home?
You can light a candle in memory of a loved one, pray or write a letter to God about your grief, listen to comforting worship music, or read verses such as Psalm 34:18 (“The Lord is close to the brokenhearted”). These small acts invite reflection and renewal.
6. How does grief counseling complement my faith?
Therapy helps you process emotions, while faith helps you find meaning and hope. Together, they offer balance—one tends the heart, the other nurtures the soul. Through grief counseling in San Diego, you can experience both emotional and spiritual restoration.
7. What if my grief feels tied to past trauma?
When grief and trauma overlap, it can feel heavy and complex. I provide trauma-informed care, including EMDR, to help you process pain safely and rebuild trust in yourself and your faith. You can learn more on my Trauma Therapist Chula Vista page.
8. How can I begin grief counseling in San Diego?
You can start by scheduling a free 15-minute phone consultation. It’s a chance for us to connect, talk about your needs, and see if we’re a good fit. You can reach me through my Contact Page.
